Bank Holiday Confessions

I have to confess now that I did not beat the bank holiday this time round. It did in fact beat me. I gained 1.5lbs when I weighed in on tuesday. I expected a gain and if you continue reading you might understand why.

Ballybunion

It started on friday when I got bad news. I got the letter that I have been waiting 8 weeks for. I did not get a place on the masters that I have been working towards for the last 4 years. I was devastated and I did bawl my eyes out for a solid 15 minutes after opening the letter. It has thrown everything up in the air for me and I really have to start from scratch and figure out what I am going to do, it's a scary feeling, not knowing. I ate about 200g of chocolate friday night and half a bag of marshmallows, I didn't care. I was allowing myself to have it. I was having a night off from weight watchers and I would get back on track saturday. But of course, I didn't! I focused on going to Ballybuinion and having a relaxing weekend with my family which I did, but I also failed to control or track my eating. I was still feeling sorry for myself and I am a natural comfort eater. saturday night we all ventured to the chipper I mentioned in my last post, I shared a burger and curry cheese chips with my sister so that wasn't as bad as it could have been.

My sister and me 

sunday consisted of a Cooked breakfast, a picnic on the beach with doughnuts, biscuits, chocolate and crisps. we went swimming and played ball games too but obviously ate more than that counteracted! Sunday night we had booked into a lovely restaurant and I went ahead and had 3 full courses and wine...oh and don't forget the gin and tonics! 

can you see now why I was up? 

wait! there is more... 

monday was another day at the beach with much more of the same followed by a home cooked meal of steak, garlic & cream potato gratin and roast veg and more wine. Then we all went for a stroll around Ballybuinion. yeah a stroll, I couldn't get away with calling it a walk, I probably didn't even burn one calorie. Oh then me and william stopped and had an ice cream sunday that had hot doughnuts in it!

William and me

I still failed to get back on track when we got home on tuesday, despite weighing in with a gain, I went and got a curry after the meeting and ate more doughnuts, Seriously what was going on with me and doughnuts this week, I don't know! I was quiet upset on tuesday, I thought I had gotten over not getting the masters but I really haven't yet. I will in time I know, just need to figure out my next step.

I am back on track now, even though it was a bit questionable at times today. there was a party in work and I ate sweets and biscuits and a burger and sausages. I was thinking screw it, I will pretend it never happened. When I got home though I decided I would be accountable and I wrote it all down and crossed out the points and I didn't have dinner. No, I am not starving myself, I stuffed myself in work and I wasn't hungry, so really eating dinner would have been pointless and waste more points. I will have some fruit if I get hungry. 

So now I really am back on track and I am going to stay that way. I will have a loss next week!